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Chronic stress is the exhausting work of staying afloat. When you’re already overwhelmed, being told to ‘just think positive’ feels like an impossible demand. This guide offers a different path: using the humor already in your life as a practical tool to release the pressure.
Key takeaways
- Laughter is a physical response that can actively reduce stress hormones.
- Sharing a laugh with others is a powerful way to build social bonds.
- You can learn to use humor as a skill to cope with daily challenges.
- Healthy humor is about connection, not about avoiding difficult emotions.
- Certain humor styles can be harmful to your mental health and relationships.
The mental health benefits of laughter
Beyond a momentary good feeling, genuine laughter triggers powerful physiological changes in your brain and body.
It reduces stress and anxiety
Chronic stress keeps your body in a state of high alert, fueled by stress hormones like cortisol. This can leave your muscles tense and your mind racing. Laughter works as a natural circuit breaker for this response.
What feels like a simple laugh is actually your body hitting the brakes on its own stress response.
It increases your intake of oxygen-rich air, stimulates circulation, and can relax your muscles for up to 45 minutes after.
It eases symptoms of depression
Depression often feels like a heavy weight, creating a cycle of negative thoughts that can feel impossible to escape. While humor is not a cure, it can be a powerful tool for creating moments of relief.
It provides a temporary distraction from painful thoughts. Humor therapy offers a way to positively shift your emotional state, even if just for a little while.
It boosts your overall mood
Laughter can trigger the release of endorphins, which are the body’s natural feel-good chemicals. Endorphins promote an overall sense of well-being and can even temporarily relieve pain.
Think of it as a natural reset button for your emotional state. This chemical shift is one of the reasons a good laugh can leave you feeling lighter and more optimistic long after the joke is over.
It can strengthen your immune system
Long-term stress can take a toll on your body’s defenses. By reducing stress hormones and increasing positive feelings, laughter can contribute to a healthier physical state.
Negative thoughts can trigger chemical reactions that impact your body, and positive thoughts can have the same effect. Over time, a life with more room for levity can contribute to a stronger, more resilient physical state.
How laughter strengthens social bonds
Humor’s most profound work happens not just inside you, but between you and someone else. It turns a shared moment into a genuine connection.
It connects us with others
When you laugh with someone, you’re communicating something deeper than words. You are non-verbally saying, “We see the world the same way in this moment.”
This shared perspective is a powerful social glue.
It signals safety, similarity, and a mutual understanding that builds rapport almost instantly.
This is a core part of how we form relationships, as shared laughter creates a sense of similarity that strengthens feelings of connection.
It helps build intimacy and trust
Trust is built on shared vulnerability. When you share a laugh, especially one that’s self-deprecating or based on a shared history, you’re creating a private world between the two of you.
These moments become the foundation of inside jokes and shared memories. They are the small, consistent affirmations that say, “I am safe with you,” which are the building blocks of a deep, trusting bond.
It helps build intimacy and trust
Trust is built on shared vulnerability. When you share a laugh, especially one that’s self-deprecating or based on a shared history, you’re creating a private world between the two of you.
These moments become the foundation of inside jokes and shared memories. They are the small, consistent affirmations that say, “I am safe with you,” which are the building blocks of a deep, trusting bond.
How to use humor as a healthy coping tool
This isn’t about forcing yourself to be funny. It’s about creating more space for lightness in the life you’re already living.
Find laughter in everyday moments
You can start by intentionally seeking out sources of humor that work for you.
A simple first step is to surround yourself with things you find funny, whether it’s a book, a favorite movie, or a playlist of videos.
- Keep a humor library: Bookmark funny videos, save a favorite comedian’s special, or keep a book of cartoons on your desk. Make it easy to find a reliable laugh in less than a minute.
- Share a funny moment: When you see something that makes you smile, send it to a friend. The act of sharing not only brightens their day but also reinforces your own positive feelings.
- Look for small absurdities: Notice the ridiculousness of everyday life—the cat trying to fit in a tiny box, the autocorrect fail in a text, the irony of a “help wanted” sign on a broken door.
Develop a more playful mindset
A playful mindset is about lowering the stakes on everyday frustrations and allowing yourself to be more flexible and less rigid. It’s a conscious choice to look for the lighter side of a difficult situation.
- Reframe a frustration: Stuck in traffic? See it as a few minutes to listen to your favorite podcast. Spilled coffee on your shirt? Acknowledge the annoyance, then picture it as modern art.
- Try something new (badly): Attempt a new recipe, try to draw, or learn one chord on a guitar. The goal isn’t to be good at it, but to enjoy the process of learning without pressure.
- Ask “what if?”: Engage your curiosity. What if your commute was a secret mission? What if your pet could talk? This kind of thinking breaks you out of rigid, anxious thought patterns.
Learn to laugh at yourself (gently)
This is the most advanced skill, and it requires self-compassion. It’s not about mocking your flaws, but about finding the humor in our shared imperfections as humans.
- Narrate a clumsy moment: When you trip over nothing or forget a word mid-sentence, try narrating it in your head like a sportscaster. This creates distance and turns a moment of embarrassment into a story.
- Acknowledge the irony: Notice the times when your actions contradict your intentions, such as when you rush to a yoga class to relax. Seeing the irony is a form of gentle self-awareness.
- Share the story with someone trusted: Turning a personal blunder into a funny story for a friend transforms it from a moment of shame into a moment of connection.
When is humor not an effective coping skill?
Like any powerful tool, the effect of humor depends entirely on how it’s used. Using it skillfully builds connection; using it carelessly can create distance and pain.
Understanding maladaptive or inappropriate humor
Healthy humor is about connection and lifting people, including yourself. Maladaptive humor does the opposite—it creates division or reinforces shame. Researchers often describe four distinct humor styles:
- Affiliative humor: This is the humor of connection—sharing funny stories, inside jokes, and witty banter to strengthen relationships.
- Self-enhancing humor: This is about maintaining a humorous, positive outlook on life, even in the face of stress. It’s about finding the irony or absurdity in a tough situation without putting yourself down.
- Aggressive humor: This style uses sarcasm, teasing, ridicule, or “roasting” to put others down. It’s humor at someone else’s expense and is often used to assert dominance or express criticism.
- Self-defeating humor: This involves putting yourself down in an excessive or disparaging way to get a laugh. While gentle self-deprecation can be endearing, this style reinforces negative self-worth.
The first two styles are consistently linked to better well-being. In contrast, aggressive and self-defeating styles correlate with negative outcomes like loneliness, anxiety, and depression.
The line between healthy and harmful is crossed when a joke’s primary purpose is to create distance instead of connection.
Avoiding humor as a form of emotional denial
There is a critical difference between using humor to cope with a feeling and using it to avoid a feeling entirely. Coping is about making a difficult emotion more manageable. Avoidance is about pretending it doesn’t exist. This can look like:
- Immediately making a joke when someone tries to have a serious conversation.
- Using sarcasm to deflect a genuine question about how you are feeling.
- Consistently playing the “clown” to prevent anyone from seeing your vulnerability.
When you’re navigating a painful experience, a moment of levity can be a lifeline. But when humor becomes your only response to difficulty, it stops being a coping skill and becomes a defense mechanism.
Humor should be a bridge to help you process your emotions, not a wall you build to hide from them.
Hope for your journey
Laughter doesn’t ask for a reason. You just need a moment to take a breath and laugh. That single laugh is your body reminding your mind what relief feels like.
Compassionate support for your mental health
Care at Modern Recovery Services
When coping skills aren’t enough to manage the weight of chronic stress, it’s a sign that you need more support. Modern Recovery Services provides the structured, compassionate care that can help you heal and build sustainable well-being.
- Schedule a confidential assessment
- Learn about our Program for stress and burnout
- See how our Online IOP fits your schedule
(844) 949-3989
Sources
- Burger, C., Strohmeier, D., Spröber, N., Bauman, S., & Rigby, K. (2022). Humor Styles, Bullying Victimization, and Psychological School Adjustment. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 19(18), 11415. https://doi.org/10.3390/ijerph191811415
- Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley. (n.d.). How Laughter Brings Us Together. Retrieved from https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_laughter_brings_us_together
- Kramer, C. K., & Leitao, C. B. (2023). Laughter as medicine: A systematic review and meta-analysis of interventional studies evaluating the impact of spontaneous laughter on cortisol levels. PLOS ONE, 18(5), e0286260. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0286260
- Mayo Clinic. (2024, January 24). Stress relief from laughter? It’s no joke. Retrieved from https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/stress-relief/art-20044456
- Porras-Jiménez, Y.-M., Pancorbo-Hidalgo, P. L., López-Medina, I. M., & Álvarez-Nieto, C. (2025). The Role of Laughter Therapy in Adults: Life Satisfaction and Anxiety Control. A Systematic Review with Meta-Analysis. Journal of Happiness Studies, 26, 99. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10902-025-00934-z
- Zhou, Z., et al. (2025). Effects of humor therapy on negative emotions, quality of life, loneliness, and depression in adults: A meta-analysis. Journal of Affective Disorders, 374, 574-583. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jad.2025.01.012
Author: Modern Recovery Editorial Team
JULY 20, 2023